I will never understand...

...how come there are people to whom music is of no importance when it means the world to me.



"compensate 
alienation..."

Whatever works.

"I want to fall..."

Can’t get enough of this track.

A matter of perspective :)

I’m 41 – a fact I’m not in the least thrilled about but then again it IS a fact so denial (my favorite survival MO of choice) is not going to work here. And yet I was just called “a boy”. I'm definitely taking it as a compliment :)  

Don't you just hate it...

...when people don't return your call? And when those people know very well how much I hate it and STILL don't return my call? What am I supposed to think!?

I don't deserve this. I'm compassionate and attentive, a good listener and a loyal friend-I don't deserve to be treated this way. Should I become a bitch so that it wouldn't feel unfair at least?

I should have known better by now than to expect life to be fair. I'm beginning to think that people are nice only when they want something. What the hell happened to old-fashioned kindness? What happened to being kind simply for the sake of it?

And it just became clear to me-if I don't like it then I shouldn't be doing it to myself. I don't easily let people go but sometimes there's not much that can be done.

How soon can "soon" be?

A few hours ago Adventures in Wonderland posted this on Twitter:

"soon" they say. Promises, promises... but I'll buy it-what other choice do I have?

They "had a great time" and I had the best time ever! No wonder I'm in denial :)

Why didn't I?

Right now I could have been waking up in Patrimonio. I know why I decided not to go but somehow it feels like I couldn't have been more wrong about listening to common sense. Sometimes it really sucks to be a reasonable grownup. 

"Tonight's the last so say goodbye"

Jared sang that song at my last 30 Seconds to Mars concert in Vienne. It broke my heart then and it still breaks my heart to listen to it now:

 

Meet&Greet with THIRTY SECONDS TO MARS, Vienne, 17-07-2014

Yay! I finally have the picture! I was so nervous because I knew it was my last Meet and Greet and my last Thirty Seconds to Mars concert and I was afraid I would look like… but I look so happy! Thank you guys-it was hell of a ride :)

30 SECONDS TO MARS Vienne, France 17-07-2014

"One night to remember
One day it'll all just end"

And it did.

That'a how the story ends.

Goodbye.

Today, today, today...again :)

On the night before leaving for France I had yet again that missing-the-concert dream. It was very punctual and dramatic and luckily all the details escape me now but the unpleasant feeling remains. I hope it was just my backwards intuition.

I have just one wish for today: to be lucky to find a gig buddy. That is all. But, of course, it will be as it will be. And no matter how it will turn out to be I will not be sorry for making this trip. I already got my adventure.

A touch of magic would be most welcome of course :)

I was thinking...

Who needs to blog when there's Facebook?  People would rather press "like" than comment. Sorry, Blogger.

In Vienne - at last!

I made it. The hotel is posh with a lovely garden and the city looks pretty and cosy but I'all admire it tomorrow-I'be had more than enough excitement for one day.

This concert better be really good. Damn those expectations.

Setback

My flight from Sofia to Frankfurt had a delay and I missed my connecting flight to Lyon. Of course Lufthansa rescheduled my ticket for the next flight to Lyon and after 3 hours of waiting I'm about to get on board and proceed with my trip to Vienne. And I know such things happen and it's nothing serious, there's no drama, it's just an inconvenience, nothing more...and yet I nearly lost it. OK, I lost it for real. And right now I'm neither happy nor excited-I'm just very tired, a bit discouraged and lost.

I just need to sleep it over. Getting up at 4 am after a sleepless night messes up with your head big time.

Yeeeeeeaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh :) :) :)

There's a new 30 Seconds To Mars live video promoting the LUST, LOVE, FAITH AND DREAMS tour and it is made entirely of footage taken from both the Romanian and the Bulgarian concerts. 

AND I SEE MYSELF IN THAT VIDEO!

If I didn't make it clear enough: YEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHH !!!!!! :D

And the story goes

I must let loose of all expectations and leave for Vienne with an open mind and an open heart. I need my vision clear so I could see what's in front of me. I'm sure I'll love the view :)

So what!

I have indeed changed.

Today was a very easygoing day. No stress, no battles of tempers, no shouting around. Just a nice, civilized, warm summer day. I had an open arrangement to meet a friend after work (meaning I promised to come, she said she would try to-looks like it didn't work; whatever). So after work I sat at a table outside my favorite café, waved a smile to the waiter, he smiled back...and a couple of minutes later he brought me what I always have here-a latte macchiato and a chocolate cake. Oops! How was he supposed to know that's my usual when I come here on a weekend day at noon and never, NEVER, at 7 pm on a midweek day because it would mean a sleepless night and over 1000 extra unwanted calories. Did I try to return what the waiter brought? Did I show any sign of discontent? Did I say anything at all? No, no and no. I just put on a huge smile, said a sincere "thank you", drank the latte and ate the cake. So I'll have a sleepless night-big deal. A few years ago I used to freak out at any disruption of my routine. And now I just say "So what!" and play along with whatever life throws my way. It's the attitude that counts and when people are nice and attentive I humbly appreciate it and make sure to be nice in return.

I hope there will be something interesting on TV tonight :)

Sun & fun @Sofia Rocks

I’m so grateful to my cousin for taking these pictures-now it feels so good to look at them and recall the madness of that day :)

Burg Clam/Clam Castle 30STM M&G

Well, this is it-my happy picture with the Mars guys. I don’t think it needs any additional comment :) I'll only say that it was wonderful-and I think that shows:

SOFIA ROCKS, baby :)

For some reason SOFIA ROCKS last night left me post-gig depressed. I don't know why. I absolutely loved every second of it. Jared didn't but I and everyone within the reach of my eye sight were having the time of our lives. And now that life feels colorless and empty.

Pity he didn't like the Bulgarian crowd. Was I the only one who saw it? No one else mentions it. When he's happy with the crowd his face glows and you can feel his excitement almost physically. And in Sofia-nothing. Did I say "pity"? I'm actually heartbroken. This concert was supposed to be the best 30 Seconds To Mars concert ever! What the hell went wrong? Were the fans too shy, didn't know what to do? I did my best and I mean it was my best-I've never sung louder than I did last night. Shit. Now he'll never come back.

Nevertheless the way Jared sang last night was simply perfect. PERFECT! God, I love that voice.

Shhh!

Everything is going so great that I don't want to spoil it by writing about it.

That doesn't go to say it's all perfect. Of course it isn't-how can it be when I' traveling solo to places I've never been to before. It means that I'm a lucky girl- and I insist on the "girl" word :)