March 27th 2007 – day 7

Written in my diary on March 27^th 2007 :

9 AM
I just received an email from the Bureau of Morality regarding Year 0000 search with a subject “You have been identified as an un-american”. Thanks guys that really made my day! That terribly expensive cell phone pays off even if it was for that message only. Here it is :

From: Bureau of Morality - Year 0000 Search
[mailto:DCS1000@thepriceoftreason.net]
Sent: Tuesday, March 27, 2007 9:05 AM
To: vera@wuerth.bg
Subject: YOU HAVE BEEN IDENTIFIED AS UN-AMERICAN

http://www.iamtryingtobelieve.com>
http://www.anotherversionofthetruth.com>
http://www.artisresistance.com>
http://www.solutionsbackwardsinitiative.net/pilgrims>
||||| date-time failure |||||

vera@wuerth.bg>

--------------------

ATTENTION!

The Bureau of Morality has identified you as A CONSUMER OF DISSIDENT
MATERIAL.

This is a one time warning. Any further attempts to view, consume, or
distribute un-american content will result in the loss of citizenship
increments and/or the imposition of fines, penalties, or imprisonment.

You have choices. Make the RIGHT ones.

For further information on making good choices, visit
http://www.thepriceoftreason.net

--------------------

Bureau of Morality
One Nation Under God

I can’t seem to keep my mouth closed-I have that silly smile on my face because of the March 25th concert. I need to leave all reason to rest and just to enjoy my foolishness now.

2 more shows…just 2 more. And then what? WHAT ???

In Berlin I bought “The picture of Dorian Gray” by Oscar Wilde; my first English language book. I’m surprised it’s that impossible for me to read; it’s hard but very educating and rewarding. Ando very enjoyable. Here’s what I found: “Those who are faithful know only the trivial side of love; it is the faithless who know love’s tragedies”.

I can’t shake it out of my head-the look in those eyes. I remember the first time I saw a picture of Trent Reznor. It was 2 years after I’d become a fan. And I knew nothing about that band-there was nothing on the radio nor the TV, nothing in the music magazines (by that time in Bulgaria there was just one and it was a newspaper), no Internet access (I don’t remember if there was Internet at that time at all) and no friends to ask. I had no idea who was standing behind that music, what their names were and how did they look like. I had no idea it was one person and the name TR meant nothing. All I had was a plastic box with a tape on it containing “Pretty Hate Machine”. And then in 1992 “Wish” won a Grammy; there was an article in the one music newspaper and the first TR picture for me to see. The first thing on my mind was: ”The look in those eyes perfectly fits the profile”. The look in those eyes hasn’t changed-it is still sharp, uncompromising, cutting you in half like a laser.

2.30 PM
I am imprisoned on that train for 6 hours now and there are 4 hours more to go; at least 1 hour to get to my hotel-damn, I need Internet! What if there isn’t any in the hotel?! Being connected right now means just about everything.

Oh, my, a new country, a new city again! It is so stressful-I just learn my way in a city and I have to move again! Being on tour probably sucks the life out of you. I don’t know; maybe it is different if you travel surrounded by friends.

I feel extremely sad-I need a hug; and Internet.

9 PM
What a horrid day that turned out to be! I thought I hated Berlin; now I know I just merely disliked it comparing to how I feel about Vienna right now. I thought Berlin was unorganized but the chaos in Vienna is unspeakable.

Right now I hate Vienna and there’s a reason for that: The train Berlin-Vienna I was on was a direct train i.e. I didn’t have to make connections but the journey was long because the train passed through the Check republic on its way from Germany to Austria. On the German-Check republic border there were no problems but it wasn’t as easy on the Check republic-Austrian border. I was alone in the compartment. A guy in an uniform came to see my passport, looked at every single page in it, checked my name in his machine to see if I didn’t have a record, looked at my passport again, then said: “Wait” and vanished with my passport for about 5 minutes that seemed much longer to me. At some point I thought: “Who was that man? What if he doesn’t come back? What am I going to do without my passport?!”. Then he returned handling me a little note book and asked me to give him a sample of my signature to compare it with the one in the passport. Then he gave me back the passport and left. 10 minutes later a policeman came (with a gun on his chest; weapons make me really nervous) and asked for my passport. What? Again?! And with a slow wicked tone he started asking me questions-where was I going to, where did I come from, why was I going to Vienna, for how long, did I have a place to stay, how was I going to leave Vienna etc and the whole time he was looking at me if I was a criminal coming to abuse his beautiful neat country! I burst into tears after he finally left. No wonder I hated Vienna instantly! But Vienna people did their best to wipe out that dreadful impression. They turned out to be very kind and helpful. Never the less I collected too much stress today.