Saturday, September 15, 2007

God, I’m so tired…

And yet as I’m just about to bit farewell to a horrible working week (just; for it’s an extra working day today) and see it out of my life with no regrets (but no joy either; so tired I am) I feel the anticipation of life creeping back into my mind and body. The fact that I’m writing in my journal is by itself a proof that I at least feel more human now than the robot living on a schedule that was me for the past 5 days. The key to a mental survival in harsh conditions of existence is to block all emotions to prevent waste of time and resources. Blocking however is not equal to termination; it’s a redirecting; like a flying control center that makes planes to hang like kites in the air until a “parking lot” is available. I’m clearing my airport to make room for things and people that will bring blush on my cheeks and sparkles in my eyes. Working hard for the last 6 months was making sense because I knew what the money was for. ; now my agenda is completely empty and work is no longer a mission destined to fulfill a sacred dream but merely an obligation.

1 Comments:

Blogger balance said...

I thought no one but me could get through my Bulgarian English :)
Sometimes I’m really scared how stressful work can be and how destructive that is to the mind. I thought “What have I done to deserve this?!”

6:42 PM  

Post a Comment

Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]

<< Home